Nothing better...

There is just nothing better than being a Mom... 

I thought that when I first met Jason that life couldn't get any better... The love I had for him was more than I had ever felt for another person! I didn't think I would ever meet anyone who was as kind, caring, and funny... Although we had our struggles in the beginning with having a long distance relationship, the choices we made to make our relationship work were worth it. 

Then we were given the chance to create and now love this amazing little boy. The love I had for Jason grew even stronger once Alex was born. It's a new love, a new understanding, of what it means to be a family. To look out for one another and care for each other even when times get crazy and hectic. Jason is not only my husband but now the father of my child, which makes me even so happy, yet brings some anxiety because he is just that much more important in my life now. His safety and well being is now my concern because it's my job to protect and care for him even more now.

The love I have for Alex is a love that I have never experienced before. It's a kind of love that brings excitement, joy, worry, and sometimes hurt (yes, the saying IS true, love hurts). The way a child changes your life can just be overwhelming when you sit back and really think about it. The constant excitement of watching him grow, or even just sleep peacefully is a rush for me. I now hurry home from work just to see what Alex is up to! I just can't wait to hear how his day went, if he had fun, if he discovered something new. The constant worry about his health and well being comes from a love that is so deep inside of me. Constantly worrying if I will be able to provide enough for him - not just his basic needs but to be able to go above and beyond for him emotionally, physically, and financially. Death actually scares me now. Will I live to see my child grow into an adult?? 

Having a child not only changes the way you love, but the way you live. There are no more bad days anymore. Every day is a day to be cherished! Having hope for the future is what keeps my days so full of joy. The anticipation of being able to do fun activities with Alex and Jason as a family is too much to handle. I don't want time to speed up but, I will have to say that I can't wait to get the finger paints and play dough out, and plan that first trip to the Zoo!!!