Cry it Out

Facebook has been full of surprises lately.  Not only is my layout different on my phone, but I'm actually getting some interesting articles coming through my news feed.

The article that popped up in my facebook today is in the link below. It's called, "Letting Baby 'Cry-it-out' Yes, No!"

Letting Baby Cry-it-out Yes, No!

It's a Dr. Sears article so of course I knew it would be an interesting (and easy to grasp) article.  Sometimes when I read his stuff, it just amazes me that things just "click."  I may be feeling or thinking the same thing, yet he just puts it into words that is easy to understand and relate to.

Before my son, I thought for sure I was going to follow Dr. Ferber teachings/methods and "ferberize" my baby.  I just knew that when the time came, I was going to control the situation by being the adult, and not let my kid manipulate me by crying, and getting his way. Boy was I wrong! 

Thankfully, it didn't take me reading an article to realize that I wasn't going to be able to let my infant "cry-it-out." It was an instinct, a gut wrenching feeling to go to my infant son when he was crying.  To me, hearing any crying baby is stressful. But when it's my own son crying, I feel a twinge of actual physical pain. 

It is amazing that it only took days, maybe a week, to learn my babies initial cries. I knew the cry of hunger, being startled, needing comforting, being over stimulated, and of course just the I'm bored/fussy cry. When my son was diagnosed with acid reflux at about 5 weeks old, I listened and quickly learned his different cries that surrounded feeding time. Although it was tedious and many nights frustrating, I understood that the only way he could tell me how he was feeling was to cry. He cried when he was done eating, or wanted more food, needed to be burped, going to puke (again), need to be propped up. 

There was a 2 week period during the early diagnosis of acid reflux that all my son did was cry from 5 pm to 9 pm. The doctor called it the "witching hour" -- except as many know, it is typically more than just one hour!! This was a tough 2 weeks. It seemed like forever! My husband was frustrated and didn't know what to do but to just support me by sitting out in the living room with me while our son cried. Although it lasted 2 weeks (maybe longer), I can't imagine just putting my baby down and just saying, "let him cry it out." Now, I know I have heard that in some situations (e.x. babies with severe colic or babies born addicted to drugs) that there is just nothing you can do soothe them. I haven't done the research, but, maybe putting them down in a safe place and allowing them to cry is all that can be done.  But, for me, and our situation of knowing that my baby was in discomfort, it felt only natural to hold him, and interact with him, even through his loud screaming.

Fast forward to "sleep training." Oh wait, we didn't have to do "sleep training," my kid must have realized that mama had to go back to work and needed to get good sleep! He started sleeping through the night, although waking up early (5 - 530 am) at around 10 weeks old.  Not that I haven't had my fair share of rough nights.  There were time periods when my son wasn't going down as easy as he typically did. So, guess what, I tried the cry it out method.  I was getting desperate!! I work outside the home, tired, and wanted my son to get back on schedule. So, I tried to let him CIY. It was so ridiculously draining and stressful that I just couldn't do it. I followed the "rules" and let him cry, checked on him at 5 minute intervals, patted him on the back yet never picked him up. The few times I attempted to CIY, I never made it more than 40 minutes.  And guess where my kid ended up on those nights that he was having a difficult time sleeping???  Yep, in my bed!  And after what ever he was going through (i.e. teething, growth spurt, fever, head cold, or maybe even just wanting to be close to his mama) was over, he went right back to sleeping through the night, like he never skipped a beat!! He never spent more than 2 or 3 consecutive nights with me, but, he seemed to be more comforted with me then in his CIY.  And at his age now if he is struggling with sleep, it usually only takes a few minutes of quiet time on the couch or even in my bed.  There is usually no need to stay in mama's bed overnight, 10 - 15 minutes of comforting and he is typically ready to get right back into his crib. 

Definitely enjoyed this article and made a lot of sense to me.  Not that I disagree with what other parents have done with their own kids.... I just know that the CIY method (which I swore by before having a child) just didn't work with me.